One of the most special parts of the New School is that it is a great place for a student to make a mistake. I am not talking about the physically dangerous mistakes because there is not a really good place to do that. I am talking about a mistake based on a decision. I am talking about when students know right from wrong and choose the option they shouldn’t. And I know it is shocking, but that happens around here with some regularity, and for that matter, at every school I have ever worked at. We are always hopeful to avoid mistakes, but in a PK-8 school that is rather unlikely.

There is an absolute belief on this campus that great kids can make mistakes, and how they recover from those mistakes is what matters.  We are here to help that process of growth find a meaningful and successful conclusion. This is some of our most important work, and work that I enjoy being a part of.

I will admit that I had a tearful student in my office recently. The student had made a mistake, and although the motivation was understandable, it was still a mistake. The student is a hard worker and takes results seriously, but the pressure of getting strong results caused a lapse in judgment. The student cried and then I cried. I trust that the student knows better and will not make a choice like this again, but the student could not settle down even when I spoke about forgiveness, potential, and strong grit. Then it dawned on me, my daughter had dropped off a piece of banana bread from Pip and Anchor.

“Do you like banana bread?” I asked the student.

A confused look came across the student’s face.

“Yes, I love it,” the student quietly.

“You need to try this,” I responded and handed the student the brown wax paper bag.

As the student picked at the banana bread, I continued to lecture about learning from mistakes, growth mindset, and failing forward. Finally, the student interrupted me.

“Wait, this is really good. Like the best I have ever had.”

I knew it!! The student’s tears had dried, and even with the banana bread treat, I believe that a lesson had already been learned. There is still more work to be done with this student, but a sense of safety had been established. 

Of course, we want students to do what’s right all the time, but we will be understanding when that first mistake happens, and when the next mistake happens we will try something else. And no matter what happens, this process of mistake and recovery will always be filled with hope.